Endings make way for new.

((BONUS POST))

I had actually just typed this out in response to a womens entrepreneur facebook group post asking about fuck ups and how we have handled them. I decided that I’d like to share it with you all as well. Enjoy, loves.

I recently became unreliable in a side gig. My ego and friendship loyalty tried to force it despite so many signs that it was time to let go. Another big sign came my way and I officially let go yesterday.

It was HARD. I don’t like giving up. I don’t like being a disappointment. I don’t like making things harder for others.

A bigger scale of this situation happened years ago when I left my management job. I’d loved what I did, I was damn good at it. I realized there’s never a “good time” to leave. I did it.

Last year I similarly left the best job I’d ever had after 3 months. Ego didn’t like that I spent so little time there. And my loyalty and absolute love for the people I worked with made it so hard. But I did.

I enroll in 90 day coaching courses, and I’m currently in a 2 week gap between them. Last Wednesday I made an intention for the two weeks to overcome my fear of being a disappointment to others. Holy shit did that start immediately. Thursday and Friday I had committed to printing and shipping an order that’d make it to the hamptons by yesterday. Everything went wrong despite my having done similar projects. The recipient wasn’t disappointed, she gave me SO much grace, the grace I also deserve to give myself.

And then the side gig situation. The boss is disappointed, which is completely and wholeheartedly fair, especially because it impacts more than one person and because my output wasn’t my normal. It was time for me to be done, and it was amicable and done with so much love.

Not all of these were fuck ups. But my point is letting go of the ego, especially. Endings make space for new things that have been on their way, and the ending is the signal that we’re ready to receive the new thing as long as we’re ready and willing to get out of our own way.